Season 1

1.Rule #23: Never Lie to the Kids

2.Rule #174: Never Trust Anyone Who Charges by the Hour

3.Rule #47: Always Take Advantage of "Me" Time

4.Rule #426: Fantasyland: A Great Place to Visit

5.Rule #21: Leave Childishness to the Children

6.Rule #33: When in Doubt, Run Away

7.Rule #67: Don't Kill the Princess

8.Rule #17: Ask the Answer Lady

9.Rule #32: F-you, Rob Frumpkis!

10.Rule #3: Don't Stand in the Doorway

11.Rule #46: Keep the Holidays Low Key

12.Rule #92: Don't Do the Crime If You Can't Do the Time

13.Rule #101: Know When It's Time to Move On