Man United Eyes €20M Defender David Affengruber: Reports

Listen up, you muppets! Manchester United's got their eyes on Elche's David Affengruber, the defender who's turned into a bloody rock star in LaLiga! This lad went from free agent to key player faster than a soufflé rises! Elche wants €20 million for him, but his market value is just €9 million. If he keeps playing like he did in that 3-2 win over Atletico, he's going to be hotter than a chili pepper!