Wayne Rooney warns Manchester United of risky new wizardry

In the mystical land of Manchester, the legendary wizard Wayne Rooney cautions against summoning the risky sorcerer Roberto De Zerbi as the new headmaster of the Red Devils. With Michael Carrick, the temporary keeper of the magic, casting spells of success, Rooney believes changing the wand would be folly. Why invite danger when the magic is already brewing? Let Carrick wield the wand for good!