Arre bhai, jab India ko azaadi mili, tab log sirf 40 saal tak jeete the! Ab toh 80 saal ho gaye, aur log 70 tak jee rahe hain! Lekin samajh nahi aata, ab humara budhaapa kaise sambhalenge? Heart disease aur diabetes ka kya hoga? Kya humare liye geriatric care ka naya dukan kholna padega? Babita ji bhi toh budhi ho jayegi!
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Arre bhai, West Bengal ke health minister Mukherjee bol rahe hain ki 16 August se Ayushman Bharat scheme shuru ho rahi hai! Lagbhag 1.5 crore families ko health insurance milega, samjha? Sabko bina paise ke treatment milega, bas Aadhaar dikhana hai. Aur agar koi eligible nahi hua, toh Mukhyamantri Swasthya Yojana bhi hai! Kya baat hai, bhai log! Sabko hospital mein treatment milega, koi nahi bachega!
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Arre bhai, Delhi mein H1N1 ka bhayanak bada chalu hai! Monsoon aate hi, logon ki khar khar, khansi, aur bukhar badh gaya hai. Pehle sirf 229 cases the, ab toh 1,349 ho gaye! Hospitals bhi tayaar hain, lekin samajh nahi aata yeh virus itna kyun badh raha hai. Daya, kya karun? Babita Ji ko toh kehna padega mask pehne ke liye, warna unka garba bhi khatam! Hamesha kuch na kuch hota hi hai!
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Arre bhai, suno! Parliamentary committee bolti hai ki private hospitals ka room rate toh 3-star hotel ke daam pe rakhna chahiye! Mumbai mein Nanavati hospital ka room ₹6,000 se ₹12,000 hai, aur hotel sirf ₹2,500 se ₹4,500! Yeh kya baat hui? Hospital ke kharch toh aise hain jaise Babita Ji ka makeup – kabhi samajh nahi aata! Samjha kya? Warna Tapu ke saath milke hum bhi dhamaal kar denge!
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Arre bhai, suno! Severe Covid-19 ne toh dormant viruses ko aise jagaa diya jaise Daya ne garba shuru kar diya ho! Ek nayi study ne dikhaya ki hospital mein bhare logon ke andar chhupke baithe viruses jaag gaye. Yeh sab kuch Nature journal mein chhapa hai, samjhe? Ab yeh viruses bhi humare saath party karne aa gaye hain, kya baat hai!
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Arre bhai, Maharashtra ke doctors ka kya scene hai! Homoeopathy wale bhaiyya ko bola gaya hai ki ek chhota sa pharmacology ka course karke allopathic medicine mein ghus jao. Doctors keh rahe hain, 'Kya yeh mixopathy hai? Hum toh bas samajh nahi pa rahe!' Bombay High Court ne bhi bola, 'Chalo bhai, strike khatam karo!' Par asli baat toh abhi bhi khuli hai, samjhe kya?
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Arre bhai, Chandipura virus ka chakkar hai! Gujarat aur Rajasthan mein NJORT team bheji hai, jaise koi cricket match mein paise laga rahe ho! Bacchon ko ye virus pakad raha hai, aur Daya ki garba energy toh dekho, kya karein! 35 cases toh aaye hain, jaldi kuch karna padega warna sabko hospital bhejna padega! Babita ji, kya karun main!
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Arre bhai, suno! Union government ne bola, NFHS-6 mein kuch indicators kyun nahi hain! Anupriya Patel bolti hain, ‘Data harmonisation’ ki wajah se sirf *key health indicators* rakhe hain, samjhe? Pehle 131 the, ab sirf 101 bache hain! Arre yaar, kya confusion hai! Daya ko batao, woh toh garba kar rahi hogi, aur main yeh soch raha hoon ki Babita Ji ko kaise impress karun!
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Arre bhai, suno toh! 3 August ko India ne e-Pratyaropan naam ka ek zabardast organ donation portal launch kiya! Ab sab hospital ek hi digital platform pe kaam karenge, samjhe? Lekin bhai, abhi bhi organ ki kami hai, aur logon ka intezaar hai. Is portal se sab kuch transparent hoga, aur humara organ donation system ab zyada efficient banega. Waah, kya baat hai!
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Arre bhai, suno! Cyclospora ka chakkar America mein chalu hai! Michigan ne pehli baar do logon ko khichdi bana diya, samjha kya? Ye toh treatable hai, par bhai, sabko beemar kar diya! 18,000 logon ko pareshan karne wala lettuce hai Taco Bell ka! Ab salad khane se dar lag raha hai, samjhe? Daya ki tarah, sabko dhyan se khana khana padega!
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Arre bhai, kaam ki duniya mein sabko stress hai! Lekin thoda bahar nikalne se zindagi khushnuma ho sakti hai. Denmark mein log park mein lunch karte hain, aur hum toh ghar ke chhat pe bhi nahi nikalte! Aaj kal nature ki zarurat hai, samjhe na? Thoda khula hawa, aur sab kuch badal jayega! Babuji, kabhi kabhi toh ghar se bahar nikalna padega!
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Arre bhai, *Manipal Health* ka *bada dhamaal* aane wala hai! 29 July ko, yeh log *India ka sabse bada healthcare IPO* launch karne wale hain, ₹9,275.22 crore ka paisa *udaane*! Price band hai ₹560-590 per share, aur 31 July ko band hoga. *Duniya bhar ke investors* share bechenge, aur yeh log *debt-free* hone ki *koshish* kar rahe hain! *Kya baat hai!*
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Arre bhai, suno! Parliamentary panel keh raha hai ki sarkar ko bachon ke khane mein sugar ka dhyan rakhna hai! Agar sugar zyada ho gaya toh health kharab ho sakta hai, jaise dental problems aur obesity. Toh sarkar ko kehna padega ki sugar ki limit ko review karein, warna humare bachche toh khud se garba karte reh jayenge, samjhe na? Babita ji se kehna padega ki wo bhi is par dhyan de!
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Arre bhai, hospital chains toh ab badi badi baatein kar rahe hain! India ki healthcare industry badh rahi hai, beds badh rahe hain, aur profits thode kam ho rahe hain! Lekin yeh sab chalta hai, kyunki patients ki line lagi hai jaise Daya ki garba dance mein! Hospitals mein occupancy achi hai, par naye hospitals thoda waqt lete hain! Sab kuch badh raha hai, lekin margin ki chinta hai, samjhe? Babita Ji ko bhi yeh sunne mein maza aayega, haan!
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Arre bhai, Congo mein toh sab kuch ulta-pulta ho gaya hai! Ebola ka chakkar hai, aur logon ki jaan chali gayi hai! Vaccine nahi, medicine nahi, sirf tension hai! Yeh outbreak toh sabko le doobega agar kuch nahi kiya! Daya ki garba energy se zyada serious hai yeh! Health officials ko samajh nahi aa raha kya karein, bhai! Sab kuch theek ho jaaye, warna yeh toh sabko le doobega!
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Arre bhai, suno! Jab log bhookh ki strike karte hain, toh body ka kya haal hota hai? Pehle din toh glucose ki gaddi chalta hai, phir fat ki taraf shift hota hai. Lekin jab dino tak bhookhe rehte hain, tab muscle bhi khud hi kha jata hai! Aur phir sab kuch slow ho jata hai, heart bhi thoda chill maarne lagta hai. Khana khana bhi dangerous ho sakta hai! Babita Ji ko samjhao!
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Arre bhai, suno! Takeda ki company ne toh kamaal kar diya! India ka pehla dengue vaccine, QDENGA, ab mil gaya hai DCGI se approval! Yeh vaccine 4 se 60 saal ke logon ke liye hai, aur pehle dengue hone ki zaroorat nahi hai! Ab tak toh hum sirf machharon se ladte the, par ab vaccine se bhi madad milegi! 32 million doses toh duniya bhar mein distribute ho chuki hain! Aree, kya baat hai!
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Arre bhai log, suno! Andhra Pradesh ke Health Minister Satya Kumar Yadav ne bola ki Omicron RF.5 variant mil gaya hai! Chaar samples Kadapa se Pune bheje gaye, aur wahan se keh diya, 'Haan bhai, RF.5 hai!' Lekin tension mat lo, hospitals ready hain. Bas thoda dhyan rakho, samjhe? Daya, tu toh garba karte reh, par sambhal ke!
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Arre bhai, microplastics toh dil ke blood mein bhi ghus gaye hain! Italy ke researchers ne bola, jo log smoke karte hain, unke blood mein yeh chhote plastic particles chhe guna zyada hain! Heart attack wale patients mein 84% logon ke blood mein yeh mile, samjha? Lekin yeh sab prove nahi karta ki microplastics heart attack ka reason hain, bhai! Pollution aur smoking se bachna chahiye, warna kya hoga, samjho!
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Arre bhai, suno! India ab sirf generic dawaaiyon ka dukaan nahi hai, samjhe? 731 million dollars ki funding se humare pharma log naye ilaaj dhoondh rahe hain! BCG aur HealthKois ki report keh rahi hai ki ab hum global market mein asli medicines bhi bechne wale hain! Lekin bhai, abhi bhi kuch samasya hai, jaise ki R&D mein thoda kam paisa kharch hota hai. Samjha kya? Acha, chalo, ab ghar jaake Daya se baat karte hain!
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Arre bhai, Nestlé ne socha, 'GLP-1 waale logon ka kya karein?' Unka taste toh bilkul khatam ho gaya hai! Ab toh chocolate bhi boring lagti hai! Nestlé ke chefs masale daal rahe hain, jaise Daya ki garba mein energy! Nutrition label bhi aise print ho raha hai jaise Babita Ji ka naam! Taste ka kya haal hai, bhai!
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Arre bhai, suno! Bryan Johnson, wo anti-aging ka deewana, keh raha hai uska pet khud ko kha raha hai! Kya baat hai! Usne kaha, "Mera stomach toh khud ka dushman ban gaya hai!" 2-5% logon ko ye bimari hoti hai, aur wo bhi chupke se! Ab wo isse thik karne ki koshish karega, jaise Daya ji garba karte hain, waise hi! Sabko pata hai, ye stomach ka kaam hai, samjhe na?
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Arre bhai, West Bengal ki sarkar ne school meals se anda nikaal diya! Ab bachche paneer aur dal se protein paa sakte hain kya? Dr. Jain bolte hain ki anda toh protein ka boss hai, samjhe? Yeh vegetarian options sirf dikhne mein achhe hain, asli nutrition toh anda hi de sakta hai! Babita Ji ko samjhana padega, warna kya hoga?
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Arre bhai, Europe ki garmi toh aisi hai jaise Daya ki garba! 40 degree se upar ka taapmaan, sab log ghar mein band hain, warna kya? Hospitals mein bheed hai, aur sabko cooling centres ki zarurat hai. Dadi ke ghar se yaad aaya, unko ye sab samajh nahi aayega. Bas, sabko ghar mein rehne ko bola ja raha hai, warna kya? Babita ji ki tarah, sabko sambhalna hai!
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Arre bhai, kya drama hai! Centre ne Jackson Labs ke licenses ko kachra kar diya, kyunki Rajasthan mein kuch auraton ki maut hui hai. Health Ministry bolti hai ki inspections ke baad yeh action liya gaya hai. Ab toh WHO bhi puch raha hai, bhai! Lagta hai mujhe bhi koi report deni padegi, warna Daya mujhe ghar nahi aane degi!
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Arre bhai, suno! Union Health Ministry ne bola hai ki imported dawaon ki shelf life ab 12 mahine honi chahiye! Samjha kya? Matlab, ab jo bhi dawa aayegi, uska expiry date se pehle kaafi time hoga! Lekin biological products ka alag rule hai, kyunki unka kya hai, samjha nahi. Bas, ab sabko time milega dawaiyan use karne ka, samjha na?
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Arre bhai, jab Michael Jackson ka rang badal raha tha, sabne socha kya cosmetic hai? Par wo vitiligo se joojh raha tha! Har saal 25 June ko World Vitiligo Day manate hain, samjha na bhai? Aaj Chandigarh mein bada jashn hai, kyunki yeh koi sharam ki baat nahi hai! Samjho, yeh ek autoimmune bimari hai, lekin treatment hai! Samjhe na, Babita Ji?
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Arre bhai, suno! Center ne bola hai ki IVF aur surrogacy clinics ko har 3-5 saal mein renewal karna padega! Clinics ko 60 din pehle National Registry Portal par apply karna hoga, aur fees bhi, wah bhai wah! Level-1 ke liye 25,000 aur Level-2 ke liye 1 lakh. Yeh sab compliance ka chakkar hai, warna Babita Ji ki tarah khush rehne ka chance nahi milega!
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Arre bhai, Congo mein toh Ebola ka hungama hai! 1,003 logon ko ho gaya hai ye bimari, aur 254 toh chale gaye. Ituri province mein sab kuch ulta-pulta hai, koi vaccine nahi, koi ilaaj nahi! Log recover ho rahe hain jaise Daya ki garba se thak ke! Patient zero ka pata nahi, aur 35,000 logon ko trace karna hai, bhai! Samajh nahi aa raha kya karna hai!
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Arre bhai, suno! Government ne 16 fixed drug combinations ban kar diye! Kya yeh samajh mein aata hai? Daya ko pata chalega toh woh toh garba shuru kar degi! Expert committee ne kaha, yeh health ke liye khatarnaak hain. Safer alternatives hai, par hum toh bas samajh nahi pa rahe hain! Kya karun, Babita Ji? Mera dimaag toh khichdi ho gaya hai!
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Arre bhai, suno! Centre ne 16 FDC dawaon ki manufacturing aur sale ban kar di hai! Kyunki unka koi *therapeutic justification* nahi hai, samjhe? Yeh sab dawaein toh sirf *risk* badhane ka kaam karti thi! Ab sabko sirf *scientifically validated* dawaein milengi, nahi toh Daya ka garba dekhte dekhte sabko *safety* ka khayal rakhna padega! Bas, samajh lo warna Tapu ki *masti* se koi nahi bach sakta!
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Arre bhai, 2 million students NEET ke liye tayyar hain, par kya yeh exam ka chakkar hai? Sab jagah chinta ka mahaul hai! Goa se Nagpur tak, sabko lag raha hai ki exam ki tension Daya ki garba se bhi zyada tough hai! Babita Ji bhi keh rahi hain, 'Mental health pe dhyan do!' Aise na chalega, bhai! Counselling ka bhi chakkar hai, samjha na?
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Arre bhai, suno! Congo aur Uganda mein Ebola ka hungama hai! 200 se zyada logon ki jaan gayi hai aur 894 log confirm ho gaye hain. Doctor Mankoula keh rahe hain ki yeh toh pehle se teen guna zyada bura hai! Contact tracing toh bhai aise ho rahi hai jaise Daya ki garba practice! Sab log bhaag rahe hain aur hum sirf yeh soch rahe hain ki Babita Ji ko kaise samjhaayein ki yeh sab kuch serious hai!
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Arre bhai, President Droupadi Murmu ne bola hai ki India sickle cell disease ko 2047 se pehle hi khatam kar dega! Omkareshwar mein, unhone sabko kaha ki milke is bimari ko khatam karna hai, khaas taur pe tribal logon ke liye. Screening ka target toh humne pehle hi achieve kar liya hai! Samjha kya? Sabko is bimari ke baare mein jaanana padega, warna Tapu ke saath khelte khelte bimari pakad loge!
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Arre bhai, Kerala mein kya drama hai! Health Minister K Muraleedharan ne bola ki is saal January se ab tak 146 Shigella cases aaye hain, aur June mein toh sirf 70! Kozhikode mein sabse zyada cases hain, 74! Aur yeh deaths? 4 June mein, 1 March mein. Pathanamthitta mein toh kuch nahi hua! Daya, yeh kya ho raha hai? Babita ji, samjho na!
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Arre bhai, kya haal hai? Government ne syrup ki dukaan pe laga diya hai chakkar! Ab cough syrup lene ke liye doctor ki prescription chahiye, samjha? Pichle kuch saalon se cough syrups ki safety pe dikkat aa rahi thi, toh ab bachon ko syrup dena bhi mushkil ho gaya hai. Babita ji, kya karen ab? Yeh toh naya twist hai mere dosto!
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Arre bhai, Jaspal Rana ka dil ka haal toh suno! 49 saal ki umar mein, dil ka daura padh gaya usko! Hospital mein emergency angioplasty ke baad, aisa laga jaise koi film ka twist aa gaya! Delhi se Munich waapas aate waqt tabiyat kharab hui, aur doctor ne kaha, 'Late-stage presenter'! Samjho, dil ka kya haal hua, bhai! Ab toh heart failure ka khauf hai! Daya ji, dil sambhal ke rakhna!
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Arre bhai, stretching ka kya chakkar hai? Daya kehti hai, pehle ya baad? Experts keh rahe hain, dono zaroori hai! Pehle leg swings aur arm circles karo, warna muscle tight ho jayegi! Aur baad mein static stretching se relax kar lo, nahi toh DOMS ka chakkar aayega! Babita Ji bhi keh rahi hai, 'Jethalal, thoda stretch kar!' Samjha kya? Haan, haan, ab samjha!
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Arre bhai, Kerala mein toh chakkar hi chakkar hai! Ek 43 saal ka businessman ka Nipah virus test positive aaya hai! Health department ne sabko trace karna shuru kar diya hai, aur bhai sahab hospital mein ventilator pe hain. Panic nahi karna hai, samjhe? Sabko quarantine bhejne ka plan hai, bas sambhal ke rakhna hai, warna Daya toh keh degi, "Kya hai yeh sab?"
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Arre bhai, Delhi-NCR ke patients toh Google ko doctor se zyada samajhte hain! Ek study ne dikhaya hai ki 80% log appointment ke baad bhi samajh nahi paate, aur seedha tertiary hospitals chalte hain. Daya ki garba se zyada confusion hai healthcare mein! Aisa lagta hai, sab log Tapu ki tarah bhatak rahe hain, bas samajh nahi aa raha kya karein!
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Arre bhai, kya confusion hai! Brown sugar aur white sugar ka kya farak hai? Log sochte hain brown sugar toh health ke liye best hai, par sachai yeh hai ki yeh toh bas white sugar ka rang hai! Calories ka farak sirf 1.3 hai! Blood sugar control bhi wahi hai, bas naam ka chakkar hai. Toh bhai, zyada sugar nahi, healthy khana khaana chahiye, samjha kya? Babita ji ke liye bhi toh healthy hona zaroori hai!
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Arre bhai, coffee ka chakkar kya hai? Filtered ya unfiltered, yeh toh sabse bada sawaal hai! Filtered coffee health ke liye achhi hai, par unfiltered toh zyada tasty hai! Lekin agar cholesterol ka dar hai, toh bhai, filtered coffee hi best hai! Daya bhabhi toh kehti hai, ‘Jethalal, health pe dhyan do!’ Samjha na? Coffee ka chakkar hai, par moderation mein sab kuch chalta hai!
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Arre bhai, suno! India ka beauty market ab serious ho raha hai. Botox aur fillers ke liye naye rules aa gaye hain, samjhe? Ab sirf qualified doctors hi injectables denge, warna sabko samjhayenge! Daya toh keh rahi thi ki safety pehle, phir beauty! Aesthetic clinics ka time aa gaya hai, bhai log! Samjha kya? Ab beauty ka chakkar sirf professionals ke haath mein hai!
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Arre bhai, NFHS-6 ka report aa gaya! Lekin kya yeh kya hai? 101 indicators hain, par 43 bhool gaye! Anaemia, sex ratio, aur clean fuel ka kya hua? Lagta hai sab kuch alag survey mein bhej diya! Daya ki energy se samajh nahi aa raha, kya chakkar hai bhai! Tapu se poochna padega, kyunki mujhe toh sab kuch ulta-pulta lag raha hai!
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Arre suno! Covid ne 55,000 cancer cases ko ghar pe bitha diya! 2020 mein, sab log lockdown mein chai pee rahe the aur doctor ke paas nahi gaye. Australia se UK tak, sabka haal kharab! Prostate cancer toh 24% kam ho gaya, samjho sab kuch hil gaya! Lekin Norway aur New Zealand ne achha kiya, bhai! Agli baar health systems ko sambhal ke rakhna padega, warna sab ulta-pulta ho jayega!
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Arre bhai! India ki health survey ne toh dhamaka kar diya! Bacche ab thode kam stunt ho rahe hain, vaccination bhi badh gaya hai, aur hospital mein delivery toh 90% ho gayi hai! Lekin suno, sirf 15.3% bacche hi achha khana kha rahe hain! Yeh kya hai? Daya ki garba energy se kya hoga? Ab toh kuch karna padega, warna Tapu ko kya samjhaenge?
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Arre bhai, garmi ka maamla hai! Jab garmi se paani khatam ho jata hai, toh blood pressure bhi bhagta hai! Dr. Dadke keh rahe hain ki low blood pressure garmi mein sabse bada khiladi hai! Paani nahi piya toh chakkar aayenge, faint hone ka bhi chance hai! Toh bhai, thoda paani piyo, nahi toh Babita Ji bhi nahi dekhenge! Garmi mein khud ko thanda rakho, samjhe?
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Arre bhai, jab bhi chupp hota hai, sab log apne phone ki taraf kyu bhagte hain? Lift mein, ad break par, ya toh baatein karte waqt bhi! Lagta hai, phone addiction nahi, boredom ka chakkar hai. Doctor bolte hain, yeh sab habit hai, jaise Daya ka garba! Phone bina check kiye, dil ko sukoon nahi milta! Kya humein phone se thoda door rehna chahiye? Babita Ji se baatein karna toh zaroori hai!
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Arre bhai, WHO wale keh rahe hain ki Ebola ka ilaaj sirf clinical trials mein hoga! Matlab jo log abhi beemar hain, unhe toh koi madad nahi milegi! Yeh Ebola toh aise hi aata jaata hai, jaise Daya ki garba! Mapp aur Regeneron ke ilaaj promising hain, par sab kuch trial ke liye hai. Vaccine toh abhi aane mein time hai, samjha? Sabko confusion ka injection lag gaya ho!
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Arre bhai, suno! Vitamin B12 aur folate ki kami se mard log thake hue aur auratein bina motivation ke reh jaati hain. Ek zabardast study ne yeh bataya hai ki yeh kami aapki zindagi mein garba nahi hone degi! Samjha na? Bas khana khane ka dhyan rakho, warna ghar ke kaam bhi nahi honge. Babita Ji, aap toh samjhdar hain, yeh sab suna aapne?
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Arre bhai, jab India ko azaadi mili, tab log sirf 40 saal tak jeete the! Ab toh 80 saal ho gaye, aur log 70 tak jee rahe hain! Lekin samajh nahi aata, ab humara budhaapa kaise sambhalenge? Heart disease aur diabetes ka kya hoga? Kya humare liye geriatric care ka naya dukan kholna padega? Babita ji bhi toh budhi ho jayegi!
Read ArticleArre bhai, West Bengal ke health minister Mukherjee bol rahe hain ki 16 August se Ayushman Bharat scheme shuru ho rahi hai! Lagbhag 1.5 crore families ko health insurance milega, samjha? Sabko bina paise ke treatment milega, bas Aadhaar dikhana hai. Aur agar koi eligible nahi hua, toh Mukhyamantri Swasthya Yojana bhi hai! Kya baat hai, bhai log! Sabko hospital mein treatment milega, koi nahi bachega!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Delhi mein H1N1 ka bhayanak bada chalu hai! Monsoon aate hi, logon ki khar khar, khansi, aur bukhar badh gaya hai. Pehle sirf 229 cases the, ab toh 1,349 ho gaye! Hospitals bhi tayaar hain, lekin samajh nahi aata yeh virus itna kyun badh raha hai. Daya, kya karun? Babita Ji ko toh kehna padega mask pehne ke liye, warna unka garba bhi khatam! Hamesha kuch na kuch hota hi hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Parliamentary committee bolti hai ki private hospitals ka room rate toh 3-star hotel ke daam pe rakhna chahiye! Mumbai mein Nanavati hospital ka room ₹6,000 se ₹12,000 hai, aur hotel sirf ₹2,500 se ₹4,500! Yeh kya baat hui? Hospital ke kharch toh aise hain jaise Babita Ji ka makeup – kabhi samajh nahi aata! Samjha kya? Warna Tapu ke saath milke hum bhi dhamaal kar denge!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Severe Covid-19 ne toh dormant viruses ko aise jagaa diya jaise Daya ne garba shuru kar diya ho! Ek nayi study ne dikhaya ki hospital mein bhare logon ke andar chhupke baithe viruses jaag gaye. Yeh sab kuch Nature journal mein chhapa hai, samjhe? Ab yeh viruses bhi humare saath party karne aa gaye hain, kya baat hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Maharashtra ke doctors ka kya scene hai! Homoeopathy wale bhaiyya ko bola gaya hai ki ek chhota sa pharmacology ka course karke allopathic medicine mein ghus jao. Doctors keh rahe hain, 'Kya yeh mixopathy hai? Hum toh bas samajh nahi pa rahe!' Bombay High Court ne bhi bola, 'Chalo bhai, strike khatam karo!' Par asli baat toh abhi bhi khuli hai, samjhe kya?
Read ArticleArre bhai, Chandipura virus ka chakkar hai! Gujarat aur Rajasthan mein NJORT team bheji hai, jaise koi cricket match mein paise laga rahe ho! Bacchon ko ye virus pakad raha hai, aur Daya ki garba energy toh dekho, kya karein! 35 cases toh aaye hain, jaldi kuch karna padega warna sabko hospital bhejna padega! Babita ji, kya karun main!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Union government ne bola, NFHS-6 mein kuch indicators kyun nahi hain! Anupriya Patel bolti hain, ‘Data harmonisation’ ki wajah se sirf key health indicators rakhe hain, samjhe? Pehle 131 the, ab sirf 101 bache hain! Arre yaar, kya confusion hai! Daya ko batao, woh toh garba kar rahi hogi, aur main yeh soch raha hoon ki Babita Ji ko kaise impress karun!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno toh! 3 August ko India ne e-Pratyaropan naam ka ek zabardast organ donation portal launch kiya! Ab sab hospital ek hi digital platform pe kaam karenge, samjhe? Lekin bhai, abhi bhi organ ki kami hai, aur logon ka intezaar hai. Is portal se sab kuch transparent hoga, aur humara organ donation system ab zyada efficient banega. Waah, kya baat hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Cyclospora ka chakkar America mein chalu hai! Michigan ne pehli baar do logon ko khichdi bana diya, samjha kya? Ye toh treatable hai, par bhai, sabko beemar kar diya! 18,000 logon ko pareshan karne wala lettuce hai Taco Bell ka! Ab salad khane se dar lag raha hai, samjhe? Daya ki tarah, sabko dhyan se khana khana padega!
Read ArticleArre bhai, kaam ki duniya mein sabko stress hai! Lekin thoda bahar nikalne se zindagi khushnuma ho sakti hai. Denmark mein log park mein lunch karte hain, aur hum toh ghar ke chhat pe bhi nahi nikalte! Aaj kal nature ki zarurat hai, samjhe na? Thoda khula hawa, aur sab kuch badal jayega! Babuji, kabhi kabhi toh ghar se bahar nikalna padega!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Manipal Health ka bada dhamaal aane wala hai! 29 July ko, yeh log India ka sabse bada healthcare IPO launch karne wale hain, ₹9,275.22 crore ka paisa udaane! Price band hai ₹560-590 per share, aur 31 July ko band hoga. Duniya bhar ke investors share bechenge, aur yeh log debt-free hone ki koshish kar rahe hain! Kya baat hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Parliamentary panel keh raha hai ki sarkar ko bachon ke khane mein sugar ka dhyan rakhna hai! Agar sugar zyada ho gaya toh health kharab ho sakta hai, jaise dental problems aur obesity. Toh sarkar ko kehna padega ki sugar ki limit ko review karein, warna humare bachche toh khud se garba karte reh jayenge, samjhe na? Babita ji se kehna padega ki wo bhi is par dhyan de!
Read ArticleArre bhai, hospital chains toh ab badi badi baatein kar rahe hain! India ki healthcare industry badh rahi hai, beds badh rahe hain, aur profits thode kam ho rahe hain! Lekin yeh sab chalta hai, kyunki patients ki line lagi hai jaise Daya ki garba dance mein! Hospitals mein occupancy achi hai, par naye hospitals thoda waqt lete hain! Sab kuch badh raha hai, lekin margin ki chinta hai, samjhe? Babita Ji ko bhi yeh sunne mein maza aayega, haan!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Congo mein toh sab kuch ulta-pulta ho gaya hai! Ebola ka chakkar hai, aur logon ki jaan chali gayi hai! Vaccine nahi, medicine nahi, sirf tension hai! Yeh outbreak toh sabko le doobega agar kuch nahi kiya! Daya ki garba energy se zyada serious hai yeh! Health officials ko samajh nahi aa raha kya karein, bhai! Sab kuch theek ho jaaye, warna yeh toh sabko le doobega!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Jab log bhookh ki strike karte hain, toh body ka kya haal hota hai? Pehle din toh glucose ki gaddi chalta hai, phir fat ki taraf shift hota hai. Lekin jab dino tak bhookhe rehte hain, tab muscle bhi khud hi kha jata hai! Aur phir sab kuch slow ho jata hai, heart bhi thoda chill maarne lagta hai. Khana khana bhi dangerous ho sakta hai! Babita Ji ko samjhao!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Takeda ki company ne toh kamaal kar diya! India ka pehla dengue vaccine, QDENGA, ab mil gaya hai DCGI se approval! Yeh vaccine 4 se 60 saal ke logon ke liye hai, aur pehle dengue hone ki zaroorat nahi hai! Ab tak toh hum sirf machharon se ladte the, par ab vaccine se bhi madad milegi! 32 million doses toh duniya bhar mein distribute ho chuki hain! Aree, kya baat hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai log, suno! Andhra Pradesh ke Health Minister Satya Kumar Yadav ne bola ki Omicron RF.5 variant mil gaya hai! Chaar samples Kadapa se Pune bheje gaye, aur wahan se keh diya, 'Haan bhai, RF.5 hai!' Lekin tension mat lo, hospitals ready hain. Bas thoda dhyan rakho, samjhe? Daya, tu toh garba karte reh, par sambhal ke!
Read ArticleArre bhai, microplastics toh dil ke blood mein bhi ghus gaye hain! Italy ke researchers ne bola, jo log smoke karte hain, unke blood mein yeh chhote plastic particles chhe guna zyada hain! Heart attack wale patients mein 84% logon ke blood mein yeh mile, samjha? Lekin yeh sab prove nahi karta ki microplastics heart attack ka reason hain, bhai! Pollution aur smoking se bachna chahiye, warna kya hoga, samjho!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! India ab sirf generic dawaaiyon ka dukaan nahi hai, samjhe? 731 million dollars ki funding se humare pharma log naye ilaaj dhoondh rahe hain! BCG aur HealthKois ki report keh rahi hai ki ab hum global market mein asli medicines bhi bechne wale hain! Lekin bhai, abhi bhi kuch samasya hai, jaise ki R&D mein thoda kam paisa kharch hota hai. Samjha kya? Acha, chalo, ab ghar jaake Daya se baat karte hain!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Nestlé ne socha, 'GLP-1 waale logon ka kya karein?' Unka taste toh bilkul khatam ho gaya hai! Ab toh chocolate bhi boring lagti hai! Nestlé ke chefs masale daal rahe hain, jaise Daya ki garba mein energy! Nutrition label bhi aise print ho raha hai jaise Babita Ji ka naam! Taste ka kya haal hai, bhai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Bryan Johnson, wo anti-aging ka deewana, keh raha hai uska pet khud ko kha raha hai! Kya baat hai! Usne kaha, "Mera stomach toh khud ka dushman ban gaya hai!" 2-5% logon ko ye bimari hoti hai, aur wo bhi chupke se! Ab wo isse thik karne ki koshish karega, jaise Daya ji garba karte hain, waise hi! Sabko pata hai, ye stomach ka kaam hai, samjhe na?
Read ArticleArre bhai, West Bengal ki sarkar ne school meals se anda nikaal diya! Ab bachche paneer aur dal se protein paa sakte hain kya? Dr. Jain bolte hain ki anda toh protein ka boss hai, samjhe? Yeh vegetarian options sirf dikhne mein achhe hain, asli nutrition toh anda hi de sakta hai! Babita Ji ko samjhana padega, warna kya hoga?
Read ArticleArre bhai, Europe ki garmi toh aisi hai jaise Daya ki garba! 40 degree se upar ka taapmaan, sab log ghar mein band hain, warna kya? Hospitals mein bheed hai, aur sabko cooling centres ki zarurat hai. Dadi ke ghar se yaad aaya, unko ye sab samajh nahi aayega. Bas, sabko ghar mein rehne ko bola ja raha hai, warna kya? Babita ji ki tarah, sabko sambhalna hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, kya drama hai! Centre ne Jackson Labs ke licenses ko kachra kar diya, kyunki Rajasthan mein kuch auraton ki maut hui hai. Health Ministry bolti hai ki inspections ke baad yeh action liya gaya hai. Ab toh WHO bhi puch raha hai, bhai! Lagta hai mujhe bhi koi report deni padegi, warna Daya mujhe ghar nahi aane degi!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Union Health Ministry ne bola hai ki imported dawaon ki shelf life ab 12 mahine honi chahiye! Samjha kya? Matlab, ab jo bhi dawa aayegi, uska expiry date se pehle kaafi time hoga! Lekin biological products ka alag rule hai, kyunki unka kya hai, samjha nahi. Bas, ab sabko time milega dawaiyan use karne ka, samjha na?
Read ArticleArre bhai, jab Michael Jackson ka rang badal raha tha, sabne socha kya cosmetic hai? Par wo vitiligo se joojh raha tha! Har saal 25 June ko World Vitiligo Day manate hain, samjha na bhai? Aaj Chandigarh mein bada jashn hai, kyunki yeh koi sharam ki baat nahi hai! Samjho, yeh ek autoimmune bimari hai, lekin treatment hai! Samjhe na, Babita Ji?
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Center ne bola hai ki IVF aur surrogacy clinics ko har 3-5 saal mein renewal karna padega! Clinics ko 60 din pehle National Registry Portal par apply karna hoga, aur fees bhi, wah bhai wah! Level-1 ke liye 25,000 aur Level-2 ke liye 1 lakh. Yeh sab compliance ka chakkar hai, warna Babita Ji ki tarah khush rehne ka chance nahi milega!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Congo mein toh Ebola ka hungama hai! 1,003 logon ko ho gaya hai ye bimari, aur 254 toh chale gaye. Ituri province mein sab kuch ulta-pulta hai, koi vaccine nahi, koi ilaaj nahi! Log recover ho rahe hain jaise Daya ki garba se thak ke! Patient zero ka pata nahi, aur 35,000 logon ko trace karna hai, bhai! Samajh nahi aa raha kya karna hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Government ne 16 fixed drug combinations ban kar diye! Kya yeh samajh mein aata hai? Daya ko pata chalega toh woh toh garba shuru kar degi! Expert committee ne kaha, yeh health ke liye khatarnaak hain. Safer alternatives hai, par hum toh bas samajh nahi pa rahe hain! Kya karun, Babita Ji? Mera dimaag toh khichdi ho gaya hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Centre ne 16 FDC dawaon ki manufacturing aur sale ban kar di hai! Kyunki unka koi therapeutic justification nahi hai, samjhe? Yeh sab dawaein toh sirf risk badhane ka kaam karti thi! Ab sabko sirf scientifically validated dawaein milengi, nahi toh Daya ka garba dekhte dekhte sabko safety ka khayal rakhna padega! Bas, samajh lo warna Tapu ki masti se koi nahi bach sakta!
Read ArticleArre bhai, 2 million students NEET ke liye tayyar hain, par kya yeh exam ka chakkar hai? Sab jagah chinta ka mahaul hai! Goa se Nagpur tak, sabko lag raha hai ki exam ki tension Daya ki garba se bhi zyada tough hai! Babita Ji bhi keh rahi hain, 'Mental health pe dhyan do!' Aise na chalega, bhai! Counselling ka bhi chakkar hai, samjha na?
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Congo aur Uganda mein Ebola ka hungama hai! 200 se zyada logon ki jaan gayi hai aur 894 log confirm ho gaye hain. Doctor Mankoula keh rahe hain ki yeh toh pehle se teen guna zyada bura hai! Contact tracing toh bhai aise ho rahi hai jaise Daya ki garba practice! Sab log bhaag rahe hain aur hum sirf yeh soch rahe hain ki Babita Ji ko kaise samjhaayein ki yeh sab kuch serious hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, President Droupadi Murmu ne bola hai ki India sickle cell disease ko 2047 se pehle hi khatam kar dega! Omkareshwar mein, unhone sabko kaha ki milke is bimari ko khatam karna hai, khaas taur pe tribal logon ke liye. Screening ka target toh humne pehle hi achieve kar liya hai! Samjha kya? Sabko is bimari ke baare mein jaanana padega, warna Tapu ke saath khelte khelte bimari pakad loge!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Kerala mein kya drama hai! Health Minister K Muraleedharan ne bola ki is saal January se ab tak 146 Shigella cases aaye hain, aur June mein toh sirf 70! Kozhikode mein sabse zyada cases hain, 74! Aur yeh deaths? 4 June mein, 1 March mein. Pathanamthitta mein toh kuch nahi hua! Daya, yeh kya ho raha hai? Babita ji, samjho na!
Read ArticleArre bhai, kya haal hai? Government ne syrup ki dukaan pe laga diya hai chakkar! Ab cough syrup lene ke liye doctor ki prescription chahiye, samjha? Pichle kuch saalon se cough syrups ki safety pe dikkat aa rahi thi, toh ab bachon ko syrup dena bhi mushkil ho gaya hai. Babita ji, kya karen ab? Yeh toh naya twist hai mere dosto!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Jaspal Rana ka dil ka haal toh suno! 49 saal ki umar mein, dil ka daura padh gaya usko! Hospital mein emergency angioplasty ke baad, aisa laga jaise koi film ka twist aa gaya! Delhi se Munich waapas aate waqt tabiyat kharab hui, aur doctor ne kaha, 'Late-stage presenter'! Samjho, dil ka kya haal hua, bhai! Ab toh heart failure ka khauf hai! Daya ji, dil sambhal ke rakhna!
Read ArticleArre bhai, stretching ka kya chakkar hai? Daya kehti hai, pehle ya baad? Experts keh rahe hain, dono zaroori hai! Pehle leg swings aur arm circles karo, warna muscle tight ho jayegi! Aur baad mein static stretching se relax kar lo, nahi toh DOMS ka chakkar aayega! Babita Ji bhi keh rahi hai, 'Jethalal, thoda stretch kar!' Samjha kya? Haan, haan, ab samjha!
Read ArticleArre bhai, Kerala mein toh chakkar hi chakkar hai! Ek 43 saal ka businessman ka Nipah virus test positive aaya hai! Health department ne sabko trace karna shuru kar diya hai, aur bhai sahab hospital mein ventilator pe hain. Panic nahi karna hai, samjhe? Sabko quarantine bhejne ka plan hai, bas sambhal ke rakhna hai, warna Daya toh keh degi, "Kya hai yeh sab?"
Read ArticleArre bhai, Delhi-NCR ke patients toh Google ko doctor se zyada samajhte hain! Ek study ne dikhaya hai ki 80% log appointment ke baad bhi samajh nahi paate, aur seedha tertiary hospitals chalte hain. Daya ki garba se zyada confusion hai healthcare mein! Aisa lagta hai, sab log Tapu ki tarah bhatak rahe hain, bas samajh nahi aa raha kya karein!
Read ArticleArre bhai, kya confusion hai! Brown sugar aur white sugar ka kya farak hai? Log sochte hain brown sugar toh health ke liye best hai, par sachai yeh hai ki yeh toh bas white sugar ka rang hai! Calories ka farak sirf 1.3 hai! Blood sugar control bhi wahi hai, bas naam ka chakkar hai. Toh bhai, zyada sugar nahi, healthy khana khaana chahiye, samjha kya? Babita ji ke liye bhi toh healthy hona zaroori hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, coffee ka chakkar kya hai? Filtered ya unfiltered, yeh toh sabse bada sawaal hai! Filtered coffee health ke liye achhi hai, par unfiltered toh zyada tasty hai! Lekin agar cholesterol ka dar hai, toh bhai, filtered coffee hi best hai! Daya bhabhi toh kehti hai, ‘Jethalal, health pe dhyan do!’ Samjha na? Coffee ka chakkar hai, par moderation mein sab kuch chalta hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! India ka beauty market ab serious ho raha hai. Botox aur fillers ke liye naye rules aa gaye hain, samjhe? Ab sirf qualified doctors hi injectables denge, warna sabko samjhayenge! Daya toh keh rahi thi ki safety pehle, phir beauty! Aesthetic clinics ka time aa gaya hai, bhai log! Samjha kya? Ab beauty ka chakkar sirf professionals ke haath mein hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, NFHS-6 ka report aa gaya! Lekin kya yeh kya hai? 101 indicators hain, par 43 bhool gaye! Anaemia, sex ratio, aur clean fuel ka kya hua? Lagta hai sab kuch alag survey mein bhej diya! Daya ki energy se samajh nahi aa raha, kya chakkar hai bhai! Tapu se poochna padega, kyunki mujhe toh sab kuch ulta-pulta lag raha hai!
Read ArticleArre suno! Covid ne 55,000 cancer cases ko ghar pe bitha diya! 2020 mein, sab log lockdown mein chai pee rahe the aur doctor ke paas nahi gaye. Australia se UK tak, sabka haal kharab! Prostate cancer toh 24% kam ho gaya, samjho sab kuch hil gaya! Lekin Norway aur New Zealand ne achha kiya, bhai! Agli baar health systems ko sambhal ke rakhna padega, warna sab ulta-pulta ho jayega!
Read ArticleArre bhai! India ki health survey ne toh dhamaka kar diya! Bacche ab thode kam stunt ho rahe hain, vaccination bhi badh gaya hai, aur hospital mein delivery toh 90% ho gayi hai! Lekin suno, sirf 15.3% bacche hi achha khana kha rahe hain! Yeh kya hai? Daya ki garba energy se kya hoga? Ab toh kuch karna padega, warna Tapu ko kya samjhaenge?
Read ArticleArre bhai, garmi ka maamla hai! Jab garmi se paani khatam ho jata hai, toh blood pressure bhi bhagta hai! Dr. Dadke keh rahe hain ki low blood pressure garmi mein sabse bada khiladi hai! Paani nahi piya toh chakkar aayenge, faint hone ka bhi chance hai! Toh bhai, thoda paani piyo, nahi toh Babita Ji bhi nahi dekhenge! Garmi mein khud ko thanda rakho, samjhe?
Read ArticleArre bhai, jab bhi chupp hota hai, sab log apne phone ki taraf kyu bhagte hain? Lift mein, ad break par, ya toh baatein karte waqt bhi! Lagta hai, phone addiction nahi, boredom ka chakkar hai. Doctor bolte hain, yeh sab habit hai, jaise Daya ka garba! Phone bina check kiye, dil ko sukoon nahi milta! Kya humein phone se thoda door rehna chahiye? Babita Ji se baatein karna toh zaroori hai!
Read ArticleArre bhai, WHO wale keh rahe hain ki Ebola ka ilaaj sirf clinical trials mein hoga! Matlab jo log abhi beemar hain, unhe toh koi madad nahi milegi! Yeh Ebola toh aise hi aata jaata hai, jaise Daya ki garba! Mapp aur Regeneron ke ilaaj promising hain, par sab kuch trial ke liye hai. Vaccine toh abhi aane mein time hai, samjha? Sabko confusion ka injection lag gaya ho!
Read ArticleArre bhai, suno! Vitamin B12 aur folate ki kami se mard log thake hue aur auratein bina motivation ke reh jaati hain. Ek zabardast study ne yeh bataya hai ki yeh kami aapki zindagi mein garba nahi hone degi! Samjha na? Bas khana khane ka dhyan rakho, warna ghar ke kaam bhi nahi honge. Babita Ji, aap toh samjhdar hain, yeh sab suna aapne?
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